ramonaruby's ramblings and random thoughts.

To hyphenate or not to hyphenate?

Posted Sunday, March 09, 2008 6:50 AM

It's my first Knot blog post!!  This is the first step in my acheiving my Knot goal of one day being the Knottie Bride of the Week! Wink

Anyway, so on to my first topic.  This is something that I have been deliberating for quite some time, but now that the wedding is looming, I need to face it and make a choice.

As a little girl, I was one of those that would always doodle my name with a boyfriend or a crush's last name.  It always seemed a given that I would get married and take my husband's name. 

Now that I have lived with my last name for 26 years and am getting married do I truly realize how much I love my last name.  Not only does it represent my cultural heritage, but it also just flows really nicely with my first name.  Fi's last name is by no means a bad name, it is just, well, average. 

Fi is an amazing and supportive man who has made sure I know that this is my decision and that he would respect whatever decision I made.  However, I know he would be disappointed if I didn't take his name at all.  Hyphenating would be a nice medium, however, is it worth adding more letters to my name and signature?  Both our names are relatively short, but still.  Hyphenating may also be a good way to ease into the new name professionally so that there is no confusion among my co-workers and other associates.

On one hand I love having the identity that my current name provides, but on the other, just taking Fi's name would enable me to make a new identity as the wife of the man I love.  It is also early enough in my career to where I have plenty of time to create a "new name for myself" professionally.

Anyway, that is enough rambling for one post.  I guess I still have some thinking to do on this subject.

Posted by ramonaruby
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Comments

re: To hyphenate or not to hyphenate?

I went back and forth on this for a long time.  Finally decided to drop my middle name and let my maiden name be my new middle name.  It's long and ethnic and totally sound like a last name, but it's so me.  Then I can take FI's last name as my new last name.  No hurt feelings, and everyone is happy.

Posted by oneluckygal    Sunday, March 09, 2008 3:42 AM


re: To hyphenate or not to hyphenate?

I think I will be doing the same thing as oneluckygal.  I love my last name.  It's kinda long and would be too drawn out to hyphenate with FI's last name.  

Posted by ptflip    Monday, March 10, 2008 7:58 PM


re: To hyphenate or not to hyphenate?

That is a good solution for some, but in my case, I love my middle name (second part of my knotname).  Right now I think I'm leaning towards hyphenation, but then what do we do about the kids' last names (when we have them)?

Posted by ramonaruby    Tuesday, March 11, 2008 12:54 AM


re: To hyphenate or not to hyphenate?

What a great post! You touched on all the issues - heritage, career, identity. I cannot part with my middle name either! My middle name is actually my Chinese name which is what I went by for the first 10 years of my life before I even had an American name. We're planning on keep our own names for now. When we start thinking about kids, we'll consider both hyphenating our names.

Posted by redroses062108    Tuesday, March 11, 2008 3:58 PM


re: To hyphenate or not to hyphenate?

Ramona, my cousin just kept both. On her IDs it says her first name, middle name, maiden name, married name. For every day use, she uses first + married. But at least it's always right there with you!

Posted by csunsweetie    Tuesday, March 11, 2008 9:25 PM


re: To hyphenate or not to hyphenate?

I like that idea Csun :)

Posted by ramonaruby    Wednesday, March 12, 2008 4:15 PM


re: To hyphenate or not to hyphenate?

It's a tough decision to give up your last name - I've had more time than you to build my career with my name (just cuz I'm older), and I'm hesitant to change it.

You know, my dad took my mom's last name when they got married (long story).  Any chance that'll fly?  =)

Posted by gingerbreadgirl    Friday, March 14, 2008 11:42 AM


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About ramonaruby

A California girl and a Texas boy rolling out the red carpet for our Hollywood Glam wedding.