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Do You Mommy Your Husband?

Posted Friday, May 02, 2008 2:22 PM


I came across an article yesterday called “Do You Mommy Your Husband?”

Women find themselves mothering their husbands because of societal pressures to be the ultimate woman, says Pepper Schwartz, a sociology professor at the University of Washington in Seattle.

"We've been taught that the way to show love is to do for others," she says. And, according to Schwartz, some women believe that the more they nurture, the better a woman they are.


I’d like to think I don’t do this – but I know I’d be fooling myself. I pick up after my husband, remind him to not forget his keys or that he should have something besides a salad for dinner. And don't even get me started on how much I wish he hadn't have bought the new Grand Theft Auto.

We see images on TV all the time of married couples where the husband leaves his stuff all over and begs his wife to do this or that for him. In the last week I saw examples of this on “According to Jim,” “Still Standing,” “Reba,” “The Golden Girls,” “The George Lopez Show” and Everybody Loves Raymond. (Since family sitcoms are practically nonexsistant these days, I had to use reruns).

Considering the previous article I found on women spending seven hours a week on average cleaning up after their husbands, this article doesn’t surprise me.

Although, it does sound better than the reverse article: “Do You Daddy Your Wife.”

Sound off ladies (and gents), do you mommy your husband?

Posted by Shoshie

Comments

re: Do You Mommy Your Husband?

I know I do.  I'm really working on it, but that motherly instinct in me just overwhelms sometimes, lol.

Posted by Choensa    Friday, May 02, 2008 1:38 PM


re: Do You Mommy Your Husband?

Sometimes my husband says "Thanks Mom" to me because I often remind him to wash his face or eat a salad with dinner.  But that, in my opinion, isn't mothering him so much as wanting him to look good (I hate breakouts on adults so I'm super into him washing his face) and wanting a healthy husband that lives long enough to raise our children with me.  I do mother him regarding laundry though...I like it my way and he can never figure it out!

Posted by edmo    Friday, May 02, 2008 2:11 PM


re: Do You Mommy Your Husband?

I totally mother Seband have lately wondering why its the womens job (although undefined) who has more responsibility.  I think my mothering goes beyond..as I am also the only one who has any responsibility for our finances

Posted by S&R Godin    Friday, May 02, 2008 2:36 PM


re: Do You Mommy Your Husband?

I do mother my husband, almost without trying to and without knowing that I do it! I'm trying to stop doing it so much. My husband is an adult and can take care of himself but part of it comes out of wanting to take care of him. Some of the things I mention to him are things he would be clueless about without a wife but other things are just my personal preference (like wanting him to dress up or not wear a ratty, holey shirt out in public). I'm trying to tone those down so he can still be his own person.

I find it interesting though the article's reasoning for WHY women do this to their husbands.

Posted by Happy2BeKathyKluthe    Friday, May 02, 2008 2:58 PM


re: Do You Mommy Your Husband?

i definetly do, although it is something i am consciously trying to work on. i also say, you should have salad instead of crackers and cheese before dinner, or yell from the other side of the house,"don't forget to put the toilet seat down" i know thats bad, but it drives me crazy!!! anyways, i will continue to be better about it, but i honestly think it just me...i can't help it!

Posted by amccul20    Friday, May 02, 2008 3:45 PM


re: Do You Mommy Your Husband?

I mommy him, no doubts about it.  The whole, do you Daddy your Wife sounds a bit dirty :) Hehe.  I don't think Matt would would want me to stop now.  I think I got him reliant on me.  I think his world would just fall apart with out me! :)  I'd like to think that anyway.

Posted by MandyE-worth    Friday, May 02, 2008 3:49 PM


re: Do You Mommy Your Husband?

I totally do and it is so annoying.  He's 25, I shouldn't have to be reminding him to be a responsible adult.  I am trying to stop, and it seems to be making him worse, so I'm at a loss.  

Posted by lipp82    Friday, May 02, 2008 4:18 PM


re: Do You Mommy Your Husband?

I mommy my FI and I love it. His mother was terrible at it, so I took over. However, I don't baby him. He has to pick up his clothes himself. I just tell him to do it or he doesn't think.

Hm...I bought mine GTAIV...I'm either a bad mommy or the best ever.

Posted by Koneko    Tuesday, May 06, 2008 2:08 AM


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About Shoshie

This Chicagoan turned California girl is all about making people smile -- and I love to plan things. For more about me, and how I'm making my way through Just Married life, Enjoy My Blog: Tales of a Jewish Suburbanite.