Frequently Used Knot Terms, Part I

Posted Friday, January 26, 2007 11:45 AM

Welcome to Frequently Used Knot Terms (F.U.K.T.).  This acronym is no coincidence.  F.U.K.T. describes what you'll be on certain boards on the knot when you misuse or misspell these terms.  I suppose it really should be Frequently Misused Knot Terms or Frequently Misspelled Knot Terms, but F.M.K.T. just isn't as snappy as F.U.K.T.

Here's a little newbie F.U.K.T. narrative with terms bolded for your convenience:

Hi, everybody!  I just got engaged, and I'm so excited to get your (not "you're") advice (not "advise") on lots of things!  I love my fiance (not "finance" or "fiancee") so much!  Congratulations (not "congradulations") to us!  I can't wait to walk down the aisle (not "isle").  It seems like there's a lot (not "alot") to do before our imminent (not "eminent") nuptials (not "nuptuals").  I'm so grateful (not "greatful") to have found the knot.  It's (not "its") awesome!  It's really helping me not to lose (not "loose") my mind before reaching marital (not "martial") bliss!

Ahh, and now a not-so-smooth smooth segue (not "segway") into Beebeeville.  I'm doing my best not to be a total beebee, so don't worry about my using betta (not "beta") fish in my centerpieces.  My fiance and I are in total agreement (not "agreeance") about being respectful of animal rights!  It would weigh on my conscience (not "conscious") if those little fishies died just for the sake of our wedding, not to mention that I happen to think that fish centerpieces are weird (not "wierd").

Right now, I'm starting to collect ideas about lots of things: different styles of boudoir (not "budoir" or "budior" or "boudior") photos, letterpressed stationery (not "stationary"), arrangements I'd like at the altar (not "alter"), cute dresses that will make my flowergirls look like little angels (not "angles"), what brooch (not "broach") to pin on my dress sash, sexy kitten heels (not "heals"), dark envelopes (not "envelops") paired with light-colored calligraphy, a photo collage (not "college") to display at our cocktail ceremony, the best colors to complement (not "compliment") our site (not "cite" or "sight"), different styles and lengths of veils (not "vails"), and how to go about dyeing (not "dying") my crinoline.

I'm also contemplating food options.  Should we do stations?  A plated four-course (not "coarse") meal?  I know I just have to include my favorite: caesar (not "ceasar") salad.  Should we have caramel (not "carmel") apples as favors or have them as an extra dessert (not "desert")?  There are so many details to be decided that I can hardly breathe (not "breath").  The prices for all things wedding-related are so ridiculous (not "rediculous").  Sometimes just looking at all those dollar signs is enough to make me livid (not "lived").

Scared yet?  Stay tuned for Part II....